Wednesday, July 20, 2011
Integrating the No Nonsense Mommy With the Intuitive Artist
I have one final assignment before I complete my Soul Art certification course. I've been working on it for ages now. It really isn't a difficult task, I need to create my own definition of what Soul Art is, describe the value and the benefits. You'd think I was asked to replicate the statue of David or something by how hard I've been struggling with this.
I've written pages upon pages of things. I've scratched things out, moved things around. I tried typing it. I tried speaking it. I tried explaining it to my friend on the phone. Nothing has worked. I was online today looking at what other students posted and what Laura writes and trying to figure out something for myself.
At one point I wrote on a piece of paper, "What the f*ck is wrong with me? Why is this so f*cking difficult?!" And then it occurred to me. Why don't I do a Soul Art journey and see if I can get some clarity that way? Duh!
So I traced some body parts and got to doodling. I haven't tried this yet so it was pretty interesting. I was surprised at how easily it flowed. A woman emerged with a large hat, flowing hair, and a large earring.
Once I finished the doodle, I dove in to uncover the insight. There was some great stuff here. You may notice that her hat and her clothing are bright and beautiful but her face and hair are black and white. Also she is looking away and hiding beneath her large "dress." All around her are little stars and dots that seem magical.
The insight I received was all about not trying to present myself as something on the outside and to just let what is inside of me be bright and colorful. Also, realizing that the magic is all around me and within in me and that I don't need to look outside myself to find anything. I don't need to hide who I truly am because I'm fine just the way I am.
This really goes back to the fact that I seem to be living two different lives that I am trying to merge into one. I am the tough, no nonsense mom who says it like it is and gets things done (left brain) and then I am the spiritual, artistic Creative Healing Coach who accesses her intuition (right brain). It seems that there is a pretty hard line that divides the two and this is part of the problem I have been having with choosing the "perfect" words to define Soul Art. Who is doing the talking? Is it my left brain or is it my right? Can I connect the two and integrate both parts and come up with a definition that feels right to both? This has been the struggle.
I know, it doesn't seem right that all that juicy insight came from such a simple little doodle. I am continually blown away by how powerful and effective the tools are for eliciting insight.
My action step is to talk to someone about Soul Art in person who doesn't know about it or doesn't even know that I am doing it. It has to be someone I wouldn't normally think would be interested (my mommy side doesn't really talk about my artsy side to my friends...they think I am a little out there).
So that is the plan and I have to do it by Monday. Let then integrating begin (and the defining of Soul Art ;o)