I decided to add a page to my Smash Journal about my word for the year. There isn't much on it just yet as we are only in the second month of the year but I am intending on adding to it throughout the year.
|I wrote: Taking ownership of your life. Getting done necessary things so you have time to enjoy life. Balance. Letting others be responsible for their lives.|
The truth about this choice of words is that I need to redefine what the word means to me. I think I have some skewed ideas about responsibility that include negative beliefs on both ends of the spectrum.
On one hand I shirk responsibility because it is boring and confining...who wants to be a slave to responsibility? Additionally there seems to be this idea that if I am not responsible, nothing can be my fault...I am at the whim of others and live my life in reactionary mode. It is a bit of victim mentality that can only hold me back.
On the other hand I think there has become a murky line between responsibility and control for me. This really applies to my relationship with my children. If I'm "responsible" I am in control and if I am in control, everything is my responsibility. It's funny because this end of the spectrum is also tied to the whole victim thing. Poor me, I have to be responsible for EVERYTHING!
It is amazing to me how I can have beliefs that are so completely in opposition to each other and yet are so perfectly tied together. Our subconscious is an amazing thing don't ya think?
I love how things unfold when you focus on a word of the year. You never know what you're going to learn or how it will be revealed. I look forward to filling this page with all kinds of wonderful insights.
How are things going with your word of the year?