Painting Like a Five Year Old

What a day I had! I've been sick. A retched cold that is kicking my ass! I decided that I wasn't going to paint. I was just too tired to stand there and move my arm.

But then, I got some disappointing news. There was this thing I had my heart set on doing and I thought it was perfect and was definitely going to happen and then I found out that, nope, not going to happen! I was so upset I cried and cried. I was sad but I was also really angry.

I went upstairs and decided I was going to paint. I figured it was a good time to paint like a 5 year old since I was having a little temper tantrum like one. I put only chose 3 colors, white, black, and red and I started slapping paint on.

It's not pretty but it definitely expresses how I felt. I ended up adding a bit of yellow in the end. I will say that I felt a sense of release after furiously painting this girl but one of the things I do with my work in emotional release is to flip the energy so I decided to paint another little girl that could do anything and was joyous.

This one took me longer and I relished every moment I spent painting it. It seemed that I was channeling the little girl in me that knew she was amazing and was just happy to be happy. I even gave her a red glitter dress because of course she should have some glitter, no, she DESERVED some glitter. The colors were bright and cheery and the whole thing was, well, just yummy!


When I finished this painting I felt clear, calm, strong, empowered, and just darn perfect! What an amazing experience this was for me. It was like therapy on a paintbrush.

Becoming Fearless

So it occurred to me after writing yesterday's post that part of my inability to take actions stems from fear...fear of not getting it right, looking stupid...failing. Without addressing the core issue, action will be difficult to take.

That brought me to create this journal page. I created it as fearlessly as I could. I began smearing gesso all over the page and then added straight watercolor from the tube. I was using the gesso as my water and my fingers as my brush. I wish you could see the intricacies of the background. It really is beautiful!

I cut the letters out of magazine pages. I love the juicy colors and textures that I can find in magazines. Then I fearlessly took my black pen and started drawing the flowers. Normally I would have been so worried I would "mess" it up but I was being fearless!

I went in search of more quotes that spoke to my heart and motivated me to face my fear. Here they are:

Fear: Thief of Dreams

Fear is just excitement without breath

You gain strength, courage, and confidence by every experience you face...you must do the thing which you think you cannot do.
-Eleanor Roosevelt

Fearless minds climb soonest into crowns.
-William Shakespeare

To live in fear is the worst insult to ourselves
-Arianna Huffington

Fate loves the fearless.
-James Russell Lowell

and my favorite...

I must not fear. Fear is a mind-killer. Fear is the little death that brings total obliteration. I will face my fear. I will permit it to pass over me and through me. And when it has gone past I will turn my inner eye to its path. Where the fear has gone there will be nothing. Only I will remain.
-Frank Herbert Dune

Taking Action

Here is my action orientated journal page. I took my own advice from the page to make the page. I just did it. I didn't mess around, I didn't try to make it perfect. I embraced the mistakes and kept moving.

I did the background with watercolor and then painted the words in gesso. I used my white paint pen and my new sharpie pen that I love. It doesn't bleed! Yay!

I found some great action quotes and added them to the page. I think this is going to be a great reminder and motivation for me to take action. You see, I am a thinker, a dreamer, a planner...not a do-er. Problem is, all this thinking and dreaming is getting me nowhere closer to reaching those dreams. I have to begin to take action!!!

Some of the quotes that really spoke to me are:

You cannot change anything in life with intention alone, which can become watered down, occasional hope that you'll get to tomorrow. Intention without action is useless.
-Caroline Myss

A little knowledge that acts is worth infinitely more than much knowledge that is idle.
- Kahill Gibran

The self is not something ready made, but something in continuous formation through choice of action.
- John Dewey

Start where you are, used what you have, Do what you can.
-Arthur Ashe

Bite of more than you can chew then chew it.
-Ella Williams

Exploring My Soul

While browsing the Internet and spending way too much time online I found Soulcollage. It seemed so interesting and last night I decided to give it a try.

The idea is that you flip through magazines and pull out images that speak to you and then you combine them to make up a card. Then you sit with the card and let it speak to you and answer some questions about it.

I like how it combines the visual with my intuition and my inner soul. There is so much more to the actual Soulcollage process where you make a deck with different suits and you can do a reading. I don't know about all of that just yet but I did have fun making my cards. There is a good tutorial here if you want to check it out.

The card above is my Sexy Kitty Card.

She is the one who is flirty, sexy and likes to have fun. She is alive with color and enjoys her sensuality and sexuality. She is beautiful.

This cards wants me to embrace my sexuality, my feminine qualities and to relish in the fun and freedom of being sexy.

The energy this card gives me is flirty sexy, sensuous, and living life in full color.

This card is my Worthy of the Best card

She is the one who enjoys the good things in life, knows how to receive goodness and is worthy of the best.

This card wants me to own my own worth, to take care of myself and pamper myself and to surround myself with the best thing the world has to offer.

The energy this card gives me is confidence and self worth, knowing I deserve!

Been Busy But...

Still had time for making some fun in my journal!

I went to watch my son and hubby play a softball game on Friday and then I hit an art fair during the day on Saturday before I headed off to see the Counting Crows in concert at Ravinia. We brought the kids with us and have now decided that unless we are seeing a band they love, we will leave them home next time. They were good but I don't think they loved it...my 12 year old fell asleep on the blanket. :o)

Sunday I had brunch with 3 other ladies I met while going to school in NYC. It was great to catch up with them after not seeing each other for a year. We ended up sitting there for 3 hours! Later that night we headed out for a nice bike ride with the kids. It was a good weekend!

I did manage to play around in my new moleskin journal. I just bought it and hadn't done anything in it yet. This page was an attempt to play around a bit. I glued some petals down that I had cut out from magazine pages for another project I started and never finished. Then I took my new Sharpie pen and started doodling. I brought it with me to the concert and worked on it there. I like it. I want to play around with the background and maybe try it with a white gel pen to see how that looks.

Tree Love

I fell in love with the trees! I wanted to have a love affair with them. I was hiking through the woods and everywhere I turned there was an amazing tree with these beautiful roots that were speckled with moss. I couldn't stop taking pictures.

There were times when I wished I were alone in the woods. Alone with the trees. Just me and the trees. I knew I could spend hours in there if I were left to my own devices. The smell of the forest is so intoxicating and the sound of my feet hitting the forest floor even thrilled me. There is something about being in the woods that does it for me.

There was one day where I found myself alone in the woods for a few minutes. I walked up to one of my tree friends and put my feet on the roots that were poking out of the ground and I just sat there wondering what it was that was drawing me in. What was it about these trees and their roots?

Then it hit me. Whenever I have gotten energy healing in the past I've been told that my root chakra is weak and that I need to ground myself. One of the exercises for the root chakra is to imagine roots coming out of your feet and going deep into the ground pulling up the energy of the earth.

There I was standing on the roots pulling up energy and healing myself and I didn't even know why. I didn't need a why, I just felt it. I knew it was right.

It became crystal clear that some day when I move to a new location that I NEED to be around trees. I love the beach and I love the water but I NEED the trees.

Easy Peasy Flower

This was an interesting journal page. I decided to open it up and just start painting. I had no idea what I wanted to do, what colors I was going to use or what was going to happen. I started out just covering the page with paint and then going over it and over it and over it until I got something that I liked.

I ended up adding glitter which in person looks so fun but doesn't show up in the photo. I had fun with some lettering and just let the thing emerge.

It is rough and it is simple but it was the process that was so great.